Very common problem! (long mail)
The two main bum situations people get stuck in are school/work and enforced relationships (for example, having to put up with dysfunctional relatives or housemates in a shared living situation).
It's important to work on removing the problem as well as developing strategies for enduring it, or we can find ourselves stuck in the habit of enduring crap for the rest of our lives. The same is true of physical illness; it's fine to take a pain killer for a headache, but it's not fine having to do so every day! Having a strategy for change also keeps us optimistic, which helps keep anxiety down.
The 'biggies' like anxiety reduction are context-independent and the main way people deal with both these problems is by using drugs, alcohol, coffee, cigarettes, sugar and consuming things generally, to stimulate the release of neurotransmitters that ordinarily our activities in real life should be providing. Almost everyone does this. A couple of lines of cocaine can make a dull meeting/lecture/conversation with aunt sally really interesting and keep you awake enough to look enthusiastic, but regular use of anything does take its toll.
The more stressed out we get the more we spend, so working starts to cost more and more as time goes by, bad nutrition habits and sleep interruption start to take their toll and when the health bills kick in most folks on a standard wage end up breaking even (that is to say, they end up with exactly the same amount as a dude with no job on welfare). Not the intended goal, obviously, but an all too familiar one partly because the working dude has so many more debts bills and obligations. This is the 'work slave' trap.
The problem we have to overcome in standard (ie, coerced) work is the payoff between making cash and losing brain cells. The trouble is that as soon as the unconscious knows we are doing something for cash, it knows we're being coerced and up comes anxiety and down goes immunity. Creativity and inspiration drop through the floor and we're left stranded with a bad temper, approaching diabetes, cognitive decline and no mates.
In the short term it does little harm as if anxiety is low we're pretty resilient, and obviously the less anxious we are to start with the longer we can hold out against decline. Good habits of diet and sleep etc can extend our endurance. In the long term though the only answer is to stop doing it, and there are several ways round the problem for those with a creative mind. Some I've heard of are below:
Find something you like doing and get paid for it sometimes. For example computer graphics, programming, maths, fishing, having sex, taking photos, or anything else you like to do that's creative or produces a commodity. If you love doing something and you get very good at it you can usually find someone who will pay you to do it.
Find something you like doing sometimes, that you get paid for (eg work two seasons, play two seasons, or work alternate months).
Rent a large property and sublet so that you get more rent than you spend. If you pwn a property you can sublet each room and live in just one room (communal living room & bathroom).
Do lots of different small things (for example part time work, sell things on ebay, make stuff and sell it on your own site, consider self employment, keep beehives & sell (and eat) the honey).
Get some of your needs free. Join (or start) a LETS system or local employment 'for the love of it' club (people list their skills on a communal database and work for each other for free, greatly distressing the tax office). You fix their computer or their garden fence, they fix your car or paint your house etc. Also join swapping clubs where everyone lists the stuff in their attic/garage they don't want, plus what they're looking for, and you all swap for free.
Cut your wants down to your needs. Why do we need so much money when all we really need is food, water, air, shelter and companionship? Consider other lifestyles, such as travelling in a camper van, or living communally. Six people sharing a house live a heck of a lot cheaper than six people living separately.
Consider big changes as well as small. Where on the planet would you most like to live? What's actually stopping you from going there? Work out creatively how you could make it happen.
Offset the dumbing down effects of school or work by spending all your spare time doing what you really enjoy. Take in lots of comedy and keep laughing; it really does improve your attitude to life when you can see the funny side of most situations.
The first steps out of the work slave trap:
1 Make it a priority to become debt free as fast as possible and stay that way.
2 Plan at least two strategies for getting out of the rut into something better.
3 Study and do what you are really interested in as much as you possibly can.
4 Communicate with others of like mind. Options open right up when you have an international network of supportive friends. If you're fired and inspired and you know what you really want to do, tell people about it!
And finally, trust in your own intelligence and ability to interact. Things turn up. I left the uk in a camper van in 1985 and didn't come back till '98, met some amazing people, did some very funky lectures and workshops, built two houses, got two kids, lived in a barrel top with a tobacco-eating horse, had some great adventures, and disappeared into an abandoned fishing village for four years. It's amazing the amount of money we didn't need.
Anyone got any other ideas? This is a good subject to cover, as almost all of us find ourselves in such situations at some point in life.
Best,
AR
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